


The All Mighty Nine

by conceptstage



Series: Single Chapter Critical Role [41]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-29
Updated: 2019-04-29
Packaged: 2020-02-09 21:49:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18646768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/conceptstage/pseuds/conceptstage
Summary: “Now, this is the a story of bravery and skill, of kindness ten fold, of indomitable will,” he sang in a sweet baritone. “I come to you now with heroes unnamed by the crown and the guard to play up their game, they’ll tell you that knights in sigils and gold took down the ravenous army of gnolls. But this story I know for a fact is untrue cause I saw it myself and now I’ll tell you.”





	The All Mighty Nine

Jester looked up when the bard across the room started to strum on his lute. She smiled and tried to block out the chattering at the other tavern tables and the bickering coming from Beau, Caleb and Nott beside her.

“I’m just saying, it was a pretty dumbass move, you had no idea what he would have done if he’d seen you.”

“Yes, but he did not see me.”

“Yeah, because  **_I_ ** saw you and distracted him in time.”

“Exactly as I planned.”

“See, Caleb is so smart that he predicted the whole thing from start to finish.”

“Ah, well… that's not entirely true-”

“So smart! He’s the smartest!”

She was able to ignore them, finally, when they bard began to sing and she started tapping her foot and bobbing her head along with the upbeat rhythm. 

“ _ Now, this is the a story of bravery and skill, of kindness ten fold, of indomitable will,”  _ he sang in a sweet baritone. _ “I come to you now with heroes unnamed by the crown and the guard to play up their game, they’ll tell you that knights in sigils and gold took down the ravenous army of gnolls. But this story I know for a fact is untrue cause I saw it myself and now I’ll tell you. _ ”

Jester stopped tapping her foot and frowned, getting up from her seat and moving closer to hear better. Fjord looked up at her and raised an eyebrow. “Jester?”

“Just want to hear the music,” she said, distractedly. That must have sated his curiosity because he didn’t move to follow her.

“ _ They struck in the night like a plague or a thought, and as we all ran there were few who did not. Through the screams in the air and the flames on the walls, stroad a small, simple band who answered our calls. First in my sight was a half-orc of green, like the stories I’d heard not nearly as mean. His sword appeared in his hand like a sea salty wish, and he cut through the gnolls like a man cuts a fish. Beside him, more green, like a halfling she seemed, but a goblin she was, braver than any I’d seen. She flew through the smoke with a kick and a thrash, and by the time she was done the foe was merely just ash _ .”

Jester glanced at Nott and saw her look up at the word ‘goblin’. Her eyes started to widen as she realized what was going on. She met Jester’s eyes. “Did he just say…”

Jester grinned and excitedly clapped her hands. “Yes!”

“ _ Next, a man, not memorable it’s true, but he whispered some words and they did what they do. There was fire in his hair and a flame at his fingers, the smell of burned flesh, I’ve found that it lingers. At his side with panache, a demon with skin like a plum. He drew his own sword down his arm and it started to hum. Another demon, yes count them, that’s two, but this one wore pink and had skin of iceberry blue. With a wave of her hand she summoned a clone, they skipped as they killed, no longer alone. And just when I thought they were done with the beast, they waved their hands and called forth a magical treat. _ ”

Jester let out a squeal that gathered the attention of the rest of the table. Beau frowned at her curiously, cut off mid-insult. “Jes? What’s up?”

“It’s me,” she whispered hurriedly. “He’s singing about me! I’m the girl with the magical treat!”

Caleb stood up from the table to come stand beside her. “Is he… singing about us?”

“ _ And as I watched with eyes full of fear, I just didn’t hear the gnoll coming near. It grabbed me from behind and it started to yip, my life flashed in my eyes, my hope started to slip. Then out from the flames she stepped to my side, she downed the beast with a punch and told me to hide. A blue monk in red, in the blood of the dead, I skittered to safety and she stomped in it’s head. You may find it strange, it may seem like a goof, but I tell you my friends, my story’s the truth. They have no king, no master, no shrine, but they’ll come when you call, the six All Mighty Nine. _ ” He plunked a few finishing notes and then smiled, taking a smooth bow. Jester started clapping wildly, cheering louder than anyone else in the tavern cared for, and kept elbowing Caleb until he gave a quiet little clap.

He looked over his shoulder and met Beau’s bewildered eyes. ‘What the fuck?’ she mouthed behind Jester’s back. He shrugged and moved to take Jester’s seat beside her. “Did that really just happen?” she asked before he could get a word out. That guy was singing about us like we were heroes or some shit. What the fuck, man?”

“You saved his life,” Nott interjected. “It’s no wonder he’s got the wrong impression about us.”

“I wouldn’t say it’s the wrong impression, exactly,” Caduceus said, taking a sip of his tea. “You can’t control the way others see you. There is a different version of you in the minds of everyone you’ve ever met. The version of you that is in his mind are heroes.”

The corner of Beau’s mouth twisted up in distaste. “I still don’t like it. He just told everyone to call for us if they need help, we can’t live up to that kind of hype. What if people take him seriously and start, I don’t know, relying on us? We’re not reliable people, we’re a haphazard group of flakes and criminals.”

“Heroic flakes and criminals,” Nott said, grinning at her.

Beau rolled her eyes. “So, we’ve saved, like, a handful of people. That doesn’t make us heroes.”

The firbolg shrugged as Jester took Caleb’s seat to start talking excitedly with Fjord. “If that doesn’t,” he said, pausing to take another sip. “Then what does?”


End file.
